A Gift and A Curse

One thing I've learned about myself over the years is that I always root for the underdog. 
If an injustice happens in my presence, I immediately speak up. 
If I see someone being treated poorly, I'm going to stand up and say something. 
If I see someone being wronged or if I'm being wronged, 
I will not take it. 
It rubs me the wrong way.
I wasn't always that way. 
I was very quiet as a kid.
I'm even quiet now, unless you know me. 
I can spend an entire 24  hours completely silent and not care.
But the muzzle comes off if any level of respect is compromised in my presence.
It's who I am. 

Some people love it, some people hate it, some people don't know what to do with it.
It makes some people uncomfortable. 
Ruffles their feathers.
But sometimes, it's okay to be uncomfortable. 

I'm open minded to a certain extent.
No one will convince me that clogs are cute but that doesn't mean I won't say that YOU look cute wearing them.
Just don't ask me to wear them, because I won't.
I'll try them on to amuse you. 
But I'm probably throwing up in my mouth the whole time.

I'm obsessed with people's behavior. 
I pay attention to patterns of behavior.
I'm looking even when you think I'm not.
I'm listening even when you're not saying a word.
I'm usually watching you, watch me.
I study people's body language. 
I'm telling you, I believe people's postures and how they carry themselves sometimes speak loader than all the screaming one can do. 
My minor was psychology in college...so that explains a lot.

Basically, I'm neurotic.

I know when someone is genuine. 
I know when they are being fake. 
Because I spend a lot of time watching and listening. 

The flip side of that coin is that I have some things I constantly work on.
I'm not awesome at forgiveness.
I'm not awesome at forgiving or forgetting.
I remember everything someone does to me...good or bad. 
Not much goes over my head even though I will let you believe that most times.
I keep track of untruths. 
I keep track of apologies. 
I also have a hard time operating in chaos. 
It throws me off.
I remember I used to spend summers with an aunt and she yelled alot.
Not because she was mad. 
But because yelling is what she did. 
Even if she was yelling for someone to take out the garbage, she was yelling it to the top of her lungs. 
I would get headaches.
I would beg to go home on the weekends so I could get some peace and quiet.
I still get headaches if there is a lot of chaos going on. 
I'm much more zen than my wardrobe reflects.

So, I'm going to spend 2012 trying to be more tolerant.
Still watching. 
Still side eyeing.
Still hugging. 
Still loving.
Still standing up for myself and others who can't.
 But much more tolerant of people who don't abide by the same code.

Target Vest
Target Pants
Urban Outfitters Top
Thrifted Scarf
Jessica Simpson Waleo Heels
Zara Plaitted Shopper Bag


GFS said...

That was well said Sistah Girl.....u would make a great psychiatrist no need to precribe drugs Reiko will set chu straight...... Happy Holidays so glad I found ur blog. I'm dancing.........

GFS said...

love the colors here.

GFS said...

Love it! Your shoes are too cute and I can never get enough of that bag!

I have an aunt who yells too! Not about anything in particular, it's just her tone. I'm used to it now, but as a child it drove us crazy. lol!


GFS said...

O M G, are you my twin??????

GFS said...

Quite possibly! Lol
11th Commandment: Style Shall Never Be Sacrificed.

GFS said...

Love the electric blue pant and totally LOVE that bag!!


GFS said...

love love love everything on the post today!

GFS said...

GIRLLLLLLL, *cyberhug*!!!! I just read this to my love and one of my besties...they busted out laughing and asked me did I write this! Sheeezzzussss! Amen, Amen, Amen! Happy New Year and LOVE this post...as much as I love the rest of your blog.

GFS said...

Love the look!!!! The skinnies are hott!!!! Love your bag...

GFS said...

Love that blue jeans and shoe combo.


GFS said...

*cyberhug back*
11th Commandment: Style Shall Never Be Sacrificed.

Rocquelle P. said...

First of all I always love your honesty in your post!! I could totally see you as a psychologist with your well decorate office. I identified with so many of the characteristics you described, which is probably why we instantly got along so well.

I've been thinking about trying out those colored jeans in Target, and now that I see how fabulously they fit you, I shall be trying a pair.

GFS said...

Yay! Colored jeans! Love this outfit, love it love it love it!

GFS said...

So on point! Love it.

GFS said...

Can so relate! (HUG)
You are rocking those pumps, jeans, bomber, and scarf. Work it!!! xo

GFS said...

Very cute look, I love that bag. I just saw it at another bloggers site, you both are rocking it!!

Some people tell me I pay too much attention, particularly those that try to hide something and I call them on it. I don't have a great memory all the time when it comes to remembering to do stuff but I remember details, I pay attention and I log soooo much. Like you said I pay attention when people don't think I am. Another thing I notice and pay attention to is peoples tone and how at certain times their pitch and tone may change. So I may not be able to see you to read your facial expression or see your body language but I do notice changes in your tone of voice. ;-)

Carsedra of:



GFS said...

What a great goal for the new year. I know you can do it.

GFS said...

I danced. I think for the same reasons you gave I have always wanted to be a child advocate. I am not so much quiet. However, I never speak unless I am spoke to. I have manners. Never rude. LOL.

But society has gotten on this bus where we feel to need to just let issues slip by because it's not our problem. We don't want to say anything to the man beating the women on the street corner because that's their problem. Eh.

It's all of our's problem.

Love this post.

Mr. Goodwill Hunting

GFS said...

I love this post. I can be kinda the same way in some ways. I take injustice in the world really hard. And since there is SO much of it, sometimes I get a little overwhelmed and have to just hide out for a little bit til I can find my balance and deal.

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