A Gift and A Curse

One thing I've learned about myself over the years is that I always root for the underdog. 

If an injustice happens in my presence, I immediately speak up. 

If I see someone being treated poorly, I'm going to stand up and say something. 

If I see someone being wronged or if I'm being wronged, 

I will not take it. 

It rubs me the wrong way.

I wasn't always that way. 

I was very quiet as a kid.

I'm even quiet now, unless you know me. 

I can spend an entire 24  hours completely silent and not care.

But the muzzle comes off if any level of respect is compromised in my presence.

It's who I am. 

Some people love it, some people hate it, some people don't know what to do with it.

It makes some people uncomfortable. 

Ruffles their feathers.

But sometimes, it's okay to be uncomfortable. 

I'm open minded to a certain extent.

No one will convince me that clogs are cute but that doesn't mean I won't say that YOU look cute wearing them.

Just don't ask me to wear them, because I won't.

I'll try them on to amuse you. 

But I'm probably throwing up in my mouth the whole time.

I'm obsessed with people's behavior. 
I pay attention to patterns of behavior.

I'm looking even when you think I'm not.

I'm listening even when you're not saying a word.

I'm usually watching you, watch me.

I study people's body language. 

I'm telling you, I believe people's postures and how they carry themselves sometimes speak loader than all the screaming one can do. 

My minor was psychology in college...so that explains a lot.

Basically, I'm neurotic.

I know when someone is genuine. 

I know when they are being fake. 

Because I spend a lot of time watching and listening. 

The flip side of that coin is that I have some things I constantly work on.

I'm not awesome at forgiveness.

I'm not awesome at forgiving or forgetting.

I remember everything someone does to me...good or bad. 

Not much goes over my head even though I will let you believe that most times.

I keep track of untruths. 

I keep track of apologies. 

I also have a hard time operating in chaos. 

It throws me off.

I remember I used to spend summers with an aunt and she yelled alot.

Not because she was mad. 

But because yelling is what she did. 

Even if she was yelling for someone to take out the garbage, she was yelling it to the top of her lungs. 

I would get headaches.

I would beg to go home on the weekends so I could get some peace and quiet.

I still get headaches if there is a lot of chaos going on. 

I'm much more zen than my wardrobe reflects.

So, I'm going to spend 2012 trying to be more tolerant.

Still watching. 

Still side eyeing.

Still hugging. 

Still loving.

Still standing up for myself and others who can't.

 But much more tolerant of people who don't abide by the same code.

#nowdance

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