Zara Slays!

Zara had a little photo shoot over the Easter Holiday to celebrate her turning 1 in a few weeks.
My wedding photographers are now in the business of babies too!
Pinwheel Portrait is responsible for this amazing photo of Z.
I can't get enough of it! 
And this was just a sneak peek, so I can only imagine what the rest look like (outside of her slight obsession with crawling toward Amy the photographer!)
You can also follow them on Instagram @pinwheelportrait . They are based in Austin but will travel:) I love them sooooo much!
And I can't believe that I actually have to say this because some people are creepy but don't steal this pic and pretend this is your baby and start up fake IG accounts and such...because apparently that's what people do these days? Some people take the fun out of everything.

P.S...anyone know someone who works at the Gap headquarters? I didn't realize it until after the photo shoot that she is rocking head to toe GAP clothing. Zara needs a contract!

(Feel free to roll over the pic with your mouse to "Pin" it to Pinterest!




The Beatles.
The presidents.
Mickey Mouse.
This skirt.
These pumps.
All legends in their own right.


Mickey Tee (Men's): Target (on sale now)
Heels: Zara



Rocquelle and I couldn't resist getting in Barack's ear.
Everyone else does it.
Are you following me on FB and Instagram?
You should.
I often post pics there that never make it to the blog.
(Remember if you hover your mouse over my pics, you can pin my looks to your Pinterest board)


Thank You!

Just wanted to link this article listing God's Favorite Shoes and MANY of your faves as a blog you need to know. Thanks and I'm honored!

Click HERE to read more and to find some new favorites!


Grown or Sexy?

Bilingual school for Zara.
Writing a book.
Finding a bigger house.
Life Insurance.
My Purpose.
Saving money.

You can look at the list two ways.
1. The things that make me an adult.

2. A list of things that just make me hella sexy.

It depends on who you are and where you are in your life. Ha!

Who says "tomatoe" anyway?
Tell them they are wrong. 
And grammatically incorrect. 
And tell them they are trying too hard to be different:)

Jumpsuit: Target (Still available)
Headwrap: Scarf from Zara (Still available)

Jacket: Gap (old)
Necklace: Aldo (here)
Sandals: Steve Madden (old)

P.S...I'm in the midst of planning Zara's 1st birthday party soiree' gathering picnic already! 


7 Whole Days

I'm going to assume by the week I just had that God is preparing me for something great. 
I believe that the past 7 days may just have been a test of my faith and overall patience. 
I barely passed. 
Let's see what this week brings. 

Led Zepplin Tee: Forever 21
Skirt: H&M
Heels: Steve Madden 

(I'm due for another haircut already)

Have a great week!

Thank you Rocquelle for the pics, the laughs and always checking on me:)


Better Late...

Men's Thrifted Army Shirt
ASOS Asymetrical skirt (different from the one in the previous post)
Zara heels

These were taken just before Thanksgiving but she still poses the same.
I have no idea why I'm just now getting around to posting it.


GFS Christ Chic: Smize To Thy Gawds!

My baby will smile but much prefers to SMIZE! 

She's almost 10 months!

I had to include the pic  above just so you can see her "not giving any damns" and also her side pin up hairstyle. LOL!
And she wore shoes but after church she kicks them off. Don't we all?!?

Turban: Scarf from H&M (More info on the turban on my Instagram and Facebook)
Earrings/necklace: Thrifted/Vintage
Lipstick: Heroine
Skirt: ASOS...They have an awesome neon skirt available now (here)
Shoes: Steve Madden
Bracelet: I think H&M.
Top/Tunic: Target (Super old)
Zara's Dress: Old Navy

My Favorite Picture below...
1. You can now "hover" over my pictures with your mouse and save to your Pinterest board!
2. Do you follow me on Instagram and FB? You should be!
3. Christ Chic posts are simply what I wore to church.



I know this song is kind of old but I just discovered this video last night and it makes me....HAPPY! 

And not for nothing, this dude looks younger every year! (He's 41)

I love Pharrell...and this song!


Will and Jada Pinkett Smith Lied To Me

(I've been writing this post for over a week to make sure that my intent in posting was pure and to avoid people getting all up in their feelings. (lol) I NEVER post without pictures but somehow a picture of me wearing my silver flat lace ups (so true and so cute...I digress) didn't seem right. The next post will be prettier!)

You know what's not easy...being a step-parent. Here I am looking at Will and Jada's perfectly blended family and I'm thinking that my story was going to be like theirs. #chileplease

Let's get the basics out of the way.
A.  I was asked to write about my perspective on being a step-parent by Drollgirl (read her post here) and these are my experiences. I've avoided discussing step-parenting on this platforming because...well hell....just because. 

B.  My goal is not to bash anyone but to share. That's what blogging is about. 
C.  I KNOW that I have certain people who like to keep an eye on me (baby mama's friends), so just for the record, feel free to snapshot this post and send per usual... I don't even care. *hi five*

I guess I will approach what I've learned (still learning)  as a list:

1. It's not easy. Even if you have been in the little one's life for 8 years or more (in my case), there is no automatic button that says that we are gonna get it right on the first try. Circumstances are different for different families. Baby mamas, overzealous grandmothers, outside influences....all of that plays a HUGE part in how your blended family turns out. In my case, it was the case of a not so awesome biological mother (again...my opinion), an over protective (and downright disrespectful)  maternal grandmother and a child who had her own agenda. Great recipe for foolywang pie.

2. Everyone will give you their opinion even when you don't ask for it. NOTHING boiled my blood more than having other people's opinion on how I should handle my household. In my case, my husband and I were constantly explaining our parenting decisions to other people who don't live in our home 24 hours a day. They weren't there when the little one decided to steal and wear your panties (a moment to gasp). True story, I seriously thought I was losing underwear like socks for about a month until we figured out what was going on. I can't wait to laugh about this with her when she is an adult.  Or when you found full sandwiches hidden in closets for months. You hear a whole lot of "you should" or "I woulda" or "what you need to do". 

3. Step-parents automatically become the bad guy. It's written in the bible somewhere I bet. (Just kidding). But that's the deal. No matter how well you treat your new child. No matter how many "just me and you hanging out dates" you have with her. It doesn't matter if you spent an entire day on Pinterest pinning hairstyles to do for her. YOU WILL be the bad person. Anytime something went down, I got the stank eye. The whole "oh you just don't seem to like her" very much eye. Or the "You don't have kids so you must not know how to handle a child" eye. So annoying. I got a bad rap/rep from everybody. People I know. People I don't know. People who don't know me. People who think they know everything. Everybody. It took me years to stand in my truth and just decide that I know I was a positive parental authority. I knew that I was providing a home with love and nurturing but what shocked everyone's (the kid, the baby mama, the controlling grandma) was that we believed in discipline. More specifically, consequences. If you had a bad grade in class, you had consequences. That's when all hell broke loose. Nobody was used to that and it pissed everybody off.

4.  DON'T LET OTHER PEOPLE RUN YOUR HOUSEHOLD. Because they will try. In my case, it was the  (maternal) grandmother who was trying to dictate what happiness looked like in our home and also the old "let me call my mom and tell her every single thing that happens in my new home that I don't like and let's try to make it sound like a dungeon while I'm at it" trick. I've got stories for days. Everybody's hand in the pot caused a major breakdown in my first year of marriage. There were times when I cried because I didn't want to come home to real life. But not because it was so terrible but because I was so busy trying to be the "nice step-mom" and please the child, the step-mama, the grandparents.  I was so scared that I was getting judged (I was by the way) that I would be quiet or let things slide out of fear. I had to let that ish go! Because Little Bit was running a number on us all. The  minute I decided to stand firm to what my husband and I deemed acceptable in OUR house hold...the better things got for us as a couple. People like to see a house divided. Whether it be a disgruntled child, or a shady baby mama or a know it all grandmother who wouldn't let my husband be a father or me be the woman in my own household.

5. It takes time. The "Will and Jada" movement can be the result if everyone is on the same page. BUT the adults MUST be on the same page. That wasn't my truth. That's not what happened in my case. Instead of fighting it, my husband and I went through some major challenges and decided that we are not going to back down from what works for our household. Once all parties realized that we were a unit and that chaotic relationships was not on our agenda, people began to fall back slowly but surely.

6.  There is no  guide to step-parenting (parenting in general). Would I love a fairy tale ending where we all take a blended family picture  with both sides of the family and all the kids/step kids in it...sure. But it's okay if that never happens. My goal these days is to treat everyone with respect and provide a healthy household for my family. 

7. Don't assume that you know what's going on behind closed doors. People assumed so much about my new family. That we were perfect. That my stepdaughter loved me. That she hated me. That my husband didn't know what he was doing. That we were strict. That we weren't strict enough. My character was challenged, tested, tried and assassinated at times. All because I was the "step-mom."

8.  A child feeds off division in a family. If a child sees that their parents are fighting each other or other people about parenting, they will use that. I grew up in a "traditional family" (meaning no step brothers/step moms...etc.) so imagine my surprise when I learned that there is a whole new dynamic to being a step child. You have a whole extra set of adults to pit against each other. It doesn't help if the child is being told/instructed/encouraged to misbehave by their mothers, etc. I also was in the middle of the "she better not discipline my child" debate. My husband always supported me but the "other side" did not. My step-daughter could have set the house on fire but I better not be the one to say something to her. That weighed heavily on me for a long time and created a lot of internal conflicts. (My husband was not about that life, he wholeheartedly believed that I should not adopt a "seen and not heard" approach)

9. Don't force it. I try to be my most authentic self at all times with everyone. To be honest, my step-daughter and I always got along. So it was never an issue of us not liking/loving each other. It's just that I think she was torn between liking me and still pledging all allegiance to her mother and other side of the family. She hated rules/consequences. That was new to her. The crazy part is that my husband was much stricter than I was/am but I always got the backlash. I just decided to just be. Not explain myself and just be.

10. EXPECT TO BE JUDGED. I am sure I covered this somewhere above but it deserves it's own individual moment. I suffered so much because I was worried about what other people thought about me. My husband's eyes were on me. The in law's eyes were on me. My sister's eyes were on me. My friends eyes were on me. Eyes were always on me. Anytime my stepdaughter and I were in the same room, I felt like people were expecting us to break out in song and dance or to start mud wrestling. Neither ever happened. I was accused of not being "maternal" before. That SUPER pissed me off and quite honestly hurt my feelings. The truth is that every kid is not going to want to lay in my bosom and lick my tears when I weep about not having a Dr. Pepper in the house. (That made me laugh)

That doesn't make me a bad person. I wanted to have fun but I felt like I wanted to be a stable and consistent parent in her life. So if we didn't walk in the room holding hands wearing matching outfits people assumed that something was wrong. Again, I had to decide to not care about what other people thought. I knew that I was a positive influence in her life. I knew that I was there to support my husband in parenting. But I also know that I have nor will I ever be one for B.S. I am not one for foolishness, tomfoolery, antics and chaos. When we (hubby and I) decided that we weren't going to fall victim to judgement and unrealistic expectations, the easier we were both able to sleep at night. 

It's kind of hard to write this post without including specific examples but I didn't want this to be a "let me tell you what happened kind of post." There are indeed some not so pretty bits/factors I am leaving out purposely to avoid ranting/over-sharing (Because, trust me I can) but my feelings are still the same.

Please believe that I have stories for days. Do/did we make mistakes. Of course! There is not a parent alive who would not admit to the same! I remember having a discussion years ago with my mom where she shared that she made some mistakes as a parent.  So, I know that it's just part of the territory.

Step parenting is a whole different beast and it is different for everyone. It took years for me to accept that. I thought it looked a certain way. You know, with the Christmas card including all step parents/step kids and dogs. But that's not always the case but that doesn't mean that it has to be a bad experience. I believe wholeheartedly that my stepdaughter will appreciate me the older she gets.

Until then...I rock on...

What's your experience as a step-parent or even as a step-child?


In My Head


(ASOS Pants, H&M Scarf, Nine West booties (old), Gap Jacket (super old)

Here are random things I've thought lately...I don't keep a diary so this post will serve that purpose.

1. People will TRY you. I have the rudest co-worker and I strive every day to not forget that I need my job and my insurance because #iswearfogawd! I really try not to give dumb people energy but she got to me this morning. I just hate being in a position where I have to hold my tongue because of office politics.

2. I was watching that show Blood, Sweat, and Whatever and one of the "characters" (I call everyone on a reality tv show a character) acts like she knows it all! She irks my nerve! Well more importantly, people who  THINK they know everything IRK my nerve. YOU DON'T HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS MAN! #KANYEVOICE

3. I have noticed that certain people that I have written off have really been making efforts to change and I notice and appreciate it.

4. I am making a conscious effort to be the change I want to see in others. For example, if I want someone to act a certain way, I need to extend that same courtesy to that person. Hopefully, reciprocity, karma...whatever will reveal itself.

5. Decisions I have been pondering...
-Buying a jogging stroller (will I use it enough and sometimes I need that hour to excercise without the baby)
-buying the NutriBullet ( bought the Bella "Rocket" single serve blender instead for $20 at Target)
-Taking a Hip Hop Class (all because of this video and they are in HOUSTON...I wanna crawl on the floor too!)

6. This I know...people will reveal who they are without often saying a word.
7. I have to give it to myself. I'm pretty funny. Not always intentionally though. lol
8. I can't control other people. What people want to do, they will do.
9. I need to find a perfectly thin, slouchy v neck tee shirt that doesn't cut me off at the wrong part of the arms that won't fade easily.

(I really can't remember where I got those bracelets and it wasn't that long ago!)

10. My 8 month old kid is hilarious to me. She laughs at the silliest things and when she giggles it always makes me giggle. I pray that those giggles at nothing at all are ever lasting. Before the world gets a hold of her and she starts twerking and posting videos on Youtube and then I will have to beat her a$%. 

11. I hope God hears all of my silent prayers that I pray while I'm cooking, driving, sleeping, watching TV or taking out the trash. I pray a lot . About Zara. For Zara. For me. For my family. For AIRRYBODY. On your knees is not the "only" time God listens.
12. I watch people all of the time. I may never say a word but I'm always peeping people. I even have to catch myself because it's natural to me. Even when you think I'm not watching you, I am. Sounds creepy but it's in my nature.  I can tell most about a person most by watching them and not by the words that come out of their mouth.

Worn on the weekend...
Thrifted men's safari jacket
Zara Men's cap
Clutched and Covered (clutch cover)

*Not the best shots in this post but I'm going to wear these pants yet again because I feel like I haven't worn them to their full potential yet.*
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